You Do You
A few weeks
ago we celebrated my son Kemper’s second birthday. His birth story is a difficult one that did
not occur at all like we imagined it. His first birthday was also a difficult
day, not at all like we imagined it. So,
to celebrate his second birthday with a party of family and friends was
important to us. We had planned to have
our celebration at the nearby park where he could play on the playground after
eating. However, the morning was a
dreary one, the ground already saturated from a week of rain. On to plan B, a party at our house. This meant cleaning the house in preparation
for company. I’d say about 6 hours’
worth of cleaning. My husband said,
“There’s no point to all this. We won’t
use half the rooms and it will just be a mess again the next day.” But my theory was that come Reunion weekend
the layer of dirt I would have to clean (again) would be thinner! Perhaps the
popcorn trail from kitchen to couch and the goldfish swimming beneath the cushions
would be…somehow….less.
The closer
the day of Reunion came, the more frantic I found myself. Pile the sheets by the washer, scrub the
counters, file the papers, get the sticky finger prints off of the T.V. screen!
And I came back to this passage of scripture. Once again I found myself relating
to Martha. The sister who wanted to have it all together, or at least appear
that way. And so I stopped just short of
putting mints on the guest bed pillows (sorry girls) and I took a deep breath. After all, these are my Hollins sisters. The women in my life who have seen me at my
very best and my absolute worst. And
this weekend was not to come and see my organized pantry or my sparkling
countertops. It was to be together. To
return to the grassy quad where we found ourselves at home with one another.
There are
two relevant points to be made about the narrative of Mary and Martha and their
encounter with Jesus in the Scripture passage we heard today. Let’s begin with Martha. We are told that
this is her home that Jesus has entered and that he is to dine with them. This is an incredibly important detail. You see, in that day and time, hospitality was the cornerstone of
society. It is vitally important to
Martha that her home and table reflect her respect of Jesus as an honored
guest. Yes, her duties take her away
from visiting with Jesus but she is not in the wrong to do the work that she
was driven to do.
The other
important fact to know about first century Palestine is that Mary’s behavior
was in direct opposition to the manner in which she was expected to live. That is why Martha was so angry with her! It
wasn’t just because she didn’t have any help in the kitchen. It was because she was likely embarrassed that
Mary had “forgotten her place.” Later on
in the gospels, Mary rebels even more when she unbinds her hair in a room full
of disciples, dumps expensive perfume on Jesus’ feet and dries them with her
hair. But Mary had a thirst for the
teachings of Jesus. She wanted to
learn. She wanted to follow.
I can’t help
but think that were Mary and Martha alive in our time they would most certainly
be Hollins Women. They both demonstrate
strength of character and they do so unapologetically. The way I was raised combined with my four
years at Hollins taught me that I can be and do anything I set my heart and
mind to. I have a feeling many of the
women in this room would say the same. I
graduated with a degree in English and I was the only person in the class of
2006 to graduate with a major or a
minor in Religious Studies. And while things
are rapidly changing in my context, I am a female in a predominantly male
driven field. I am one of a handful of
ordained clergy women out of the 124 Presbyterian congregations in the
surrounding area. But that doesn’t
bother me. Because here’s what I have
learned and continue to learn. You do
you.
I think that
is the message for us in this narrative from the gospel of Luke. From all corners of society we find ourselves
under pressure from someone else to be someone different. To do something better. Many of us have heard the phrase,
“mom-shaming”. Ridiculous that such a
phrase should ever exist, but it does.
It isn’t just about motherhood though, it’s about everything. Are you a
stay at home parent? What a cakewalk. Do
you work full time? Shame on you for letting someone else parent your
child. Do you breast-feed…in public?!
Gasp. Oh your child is bottle-fed? Hmm…
that is unfortunate. You don’t have children, how sad. You don’t want children? Why?? You cook all
organic meals, you must be judging the McDonald’s we just scarfed down in the
van. You can’t cook, might as well take
away your female card all together. You’re
changing careers….at forty? Can we say
midlife crisis? You have a master’s degree? You must be really wealthy. You muck stalls for fun? You must be
wealthy. You’re divorced? Fail. You’re
unmarried? Fail. You have a spouse and 2.5 kids, life must be perfect. You’re retiring, that must be so nice! What
do you mean you don’t know what you’ll do with yourself? Your children are still living at home, poor
parenting. Your grandchildren have moved
in with you, I bet you are overwhelmed, what’s wrong with your kids? You don’t
go to church? Oh, that’s what is missing in your life. You’re a pastor? What do you do the other 6 days
a week? You’re transgender, let me tell you what bathroom to use. You’re gay? Let me hurl scriptures out of
context at you like daggers. You work 50 or 60 hours a week? What a great
employee, I bet you’ll be the boss one day!
You’re a republican? Scoff.
You’re a democrat? Scoff. You
don’t care about politics? Then you don’t care about anything! Judgment after
judgment. Let’s not even talk about what the term “beach body” means. We all
do it from time to time. It takes mere
seconds to think it or say it. But it
causes many layers of damage to another person. The last thing we need is to tear each other
down. We should be lifting one another up!
Out of God’s great love each of us were created in God’s
image, an image that is so deep and wide there are not enough words in our
vocabulary to appropriately describe God.
Thus, we are not expected to all be the same type of person or do the
same things. YOU DO YOU. There are many
reasons why God shouldn't have called you, or me, or anyone else for that
matter, but God doesn't wait until we are perfect to call us. You're in good
company if you think you aren't ready for God to use or you aren’t worthy of
God’s love.
- Moses was a murder.
- Noah got drunk.
- Abraham lied.
- Sarah laughed at God's promises.
- David's armor didn't fit.
- Hosea's wife was a prostitute.
- Jacob was a liar.
- David had an affair.
- Jesus was too poor.
- David was too young.
- Peter was afraid of death.
- Lazarus was dead.
- Naomi was a widow.
- Ruth was a foreigner.
- The Apostle Paul was a murderer.
- Jonah ran from God.
- Miriam was a gossip.
- Thomas doubted.
- Jeremiah was depressed and
suicidal.
- Elijah was burned out.
- John the Baptist was a loudmouth.
- Martha was a worry-wort.
- Mary may have just been lazy.
You see: We
have it in our power to stop this monsoon of negative criticism of each
other. It’s simple really: you do
you! Jesus accepted Martha’s
hospitality. The moment he stepped over
the threshold into her home he accepted Martha for who she was. Now, he may have encouraged her to sit down
and accept what he was offering her after dinner, but he had no problem dining
on the meal she so carefully provided.
Jesus delighted in Mary. I think
he valued her rebellious nature because she was the type of woman he wanted
other females in her day to feel free to become. Christ came to earth and dwelt among us not
just for Martha’s, not just for Mary’s, but for ALL people. Real people, authentic people. Broken, sinful, marginalized people. Jesus embraced people for who they were at
each encounter. He does the same for
you.
Benediction
Keep Alert (until you are too tired
to stand, then rest well).
Stand firm in your faith (unless you cannot, then know God holds you tightly in weakness).
Stand firm in your faith (unless you cannot, then know God holds you tightly in weakness).
Be courageous (until you
cannot, it’s okay to be afraid).
Be strong (unless the situation brings you to
your knees, then lean on one another).
Let all that you do be
done in love (Always. Always love).
Levavi Oculos,
Loren
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