I think by now that most of you know I have had a very
difficult week. On Sunday someone very
special to me, my mentor, and family friend Aimee Wallis Buchanan passed away
due to complications stemming from the flu and ultimately pneumonia. Aimee was just 44 years old and left behind a
devoted husband and two teenage children who I have known all of their
lives. I tell you this because today I
am speaking from a very honest and heartfelt place. I must be honest with you in telling you that
writing about Jesus’ transfiguration was the last thing in the world I wanted
to do this week. I contacted some of my
minister friends and I said to them, “I am heartbroken and I don’t know how to
write about God’s presence and Jesus’ shimmering white robe when I am sad and
angry with God regarding his bigger plans that I don’t understand. Why did God
take my friend from this world, a woman who was serving God’s kingdom with her
whole life? ” But Aimee taught me to use
my words for healing. Aimee told me when
I was very young that God is big enough to take our anger, our wailing and
gnashing of teeth. It is okay to cry and
ask God tough questions when you don’t understand what God is doing.
So it is
very hard for me to talk about the glorious mystery of God today, because, I
myself, am not thinking it so glorious.
Rev. Rick Morley made the point in his blog post this week that we as
humans want to know everything, and right now, if you please. What did we do before we had Google at our
fingertips? How did we ever stay in
touch before the days of texting and Facebook.
He writes, “As humans we've always had a hunger and thirst for
knowledge—well ever since Eden that is. And, as technology has advanced through
the millennia, we want more and more knowledge within our grasp at all times.”[1]
Morley goes on to say, “For faithful Christians,
that’s no different with our relationship to God. We want to know things about
God. We want to know how to relate to God. We want to know how this story, or
this proverb, or this anecdote applies to our life. Tangibly. Really.” But we all know that God cannot be explained
by a series of readily available facts and statistics. God is a mystery and Morley relates our
relationship with God to that of sitting in a cloud, as clouds are so prevalent
in the scripture passages today. “It’s
like entering a thick cloud, where everything is obscured. Distorted.
Colorless. Disorientated. But, there, in the midst of the cloud is the Presence
of God who has come to be with you.”[2]
We all need to learn how to sit in the cloud. Even pastors, regardless of how many books we
have read, how many sermons we have written, are anxious about being wrapped in
the fog as it descends. We need to learn
how to be comfortable about knowing about something, without full understanding
the big picture, the Something, with
a capital “S”.
More than I ever have before; I think I can relate to
Peter’s response to his time on the mountain with Jesus. The gospel of Luke tells us that Jesus had
taken Peter, John, and James with him, up the mountain, to pray. The story describes them as being ‘weighed
down with sleep.’ But because they stayed awake, they were able to see Moses
and Elijah appear and have a conversation with Jesus about his departure. Peter wants to cling to that moment on the
mountain; he wants to make the mystery that surrounded them in that cloud
tangible and enduring. He is simply
trying to make sense of this situation as best he can.
I, too, long to hold on to earthly things, to
cling to this earthly life! More than anything else I want my friend; I want to
see my friend’s dancing eyes and radiant smile once more. I want her to breathe the fresh mountain air,
to listen to music and play with her beloved pet. More than anything, I want her to grow old;
hand in hand with her husband and see her two children graduate from high
school and college. To grow tall and get
married and have families of their own.
I want that. I can see and hear and touch that kind of
life. I cannot see or feel heaven. I cannot wrap my mind around the
resurrection, even though I believe with all my heart that it is true! So, much like Peter, who was so contented in
his earthly life with Jesus that he fell sleepy, I too have often looked at my
earthly relationships with bleary eyes, taking for granted this realm. I have
not been content to sit in the cloud, not willing to hear the voice of God
saying, “This is my son, my chosen, listen
to him!” “This is my plan Loren, mine not yours, sit with me.”
Rev. Morley writes; “Moses came down from the clouded
mountain with his face radiant—changed. Because it’s in the cloud that
we’re changed. Peter, James, and John are changed on that mountain—forever.
And, not because they learned lots of fun-filled facts. In reality, they
probably descended with more questions than answers. But, like Moses, they met
the Living God. And, that’s what
changes us. That’s what alters the course of our lives. And, as Christians, that’s
what we’re all about: being in God’s Presence.”[3]
Today, I think our challenge is to figure out how it
is that we meet the living God. His
presence is everywhere, in creation, in worship, in the people we
encounter. The truth of the matter is
that I encountered the Holy Spirit in Aimee Wallis Buchanan. In her ministry and the way she lived her
life, she showed God to me. She may not
have stood before me in dazzling white but her smile truly shined and her hugs
warmed the heart. My friend, the Rev.
Jeremy Cannada reminded me that the glory that we see manifested in Jesus in
this mountaintop moment is the glory that is promised to every person of
faith. He said to me that “the
resurrection is God's love given for us, and Christ transfigured is Aimee's
faith.”
We are not promised that being witness to the
Resurrection will be easy, we are not assured that because we have faith our
lives will be without pain, or that service to the Lord keeps us from illness
or heartbreak. But we are promised eternal
life, and we see a glimpse of that this week in Jesus. In the days to come, I will try to remember
this, and I hope that you will too. Let
us cling to this promise, mysterious as it is.
Amen.
[1]
Rev. Rick Morley, www.rickmorley.com,
internet accessed 1/31/13
[2]
Rev. Rick Morley
[3]
Rev. Rick Morley
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