How do you define love?

The scriptures tell us in 1st Corinthians 13: 

"Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant⁵or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;⁶it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. ⁷It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8 Love never ends." 

We had this scripture read at our wedding (many people do) so obviously I believe it.   But I also believe that love is messy. Incredibly messy.  

Love can be patient, but sometimes the patience runs out and actions that demonstrate love, no matter how difficult, must be taken. 

Love can be kind, but it can also feel like 1,000 needles stabbing you in the back if you don't recognize it, embrace it, or think it through.  

Love isn't envious--but the brokenness of our humanity tells us that we do in fact experience envy, even of those people we admire, or love.  Love often brings us to desire what others have thinking that is what is best--but we have to consider what is best for our own hearts. 

Love isn't boastful or arrogant, or rude.   Sure it is.  When you are in love with someone you want to shout it from the rooftops loudly enough to make the birds scatter on wide wings.  

Love may not be rude, but it can be tough. It can mean setting boundaries, standing firm, being adamant with expressions that may come across as unloving. 

Love doesn't insist on it's own way, but I would argue that expressing love for self and others means having an opinion.  Just because we love, doesn't mean we are weak or meek.  

Love is irritable.  Sorry, just is.  No one in this world can make me more irritable than my child and my spouse and they are still my whole heart.  

Love is not perfection--and the rejoicing in the truth means loving the whole person, imperfections and all.  Because we will fall, we will make mistakes, we will need grace.  Love is grace. 

I do believe that love bears, believes, hopes, and endures.  Because God is love and God has not failed me yet.  In my darkest hours, the sliver of light appears beyond the crack below the doors I thought were closed.  

But love is messy.  Every single day messy.  But we keep going, because love is also hope, and ultimately, we could not endure the brokenness without it.